The Loneliest Birthday

January was the loneliest, but that’s ok.
The first month of the year is usually full of birthday celebrations and dressing to the nines and going to Mardi Gras Balls and sometimes a parade or two. Unfortunately, 2021 held none of the above.
I found myself feeling bummed about it from time to time. My actual 39th birthday felt weird. We always have dinner as a family and not having my sister, my papa or my uncle here felt very heavy.
I count my blessings and feel extreme gratitude for three amazing kiddos and having my mom here. I also allow myself to feel sad and lonely. The human mind is complex, and can hold multiple emotions simultaneously.
I know from experience that if I don’t feel my feelings, especially the lower vibration ones, then I’ll pay for it ways such as low energy, back and hip pain or self sabotage. Spending time journaling, crying and meditating helped me know why I was so sullen and to get past it.
If you’re feeling less than ideal, give yourself love, grace and time. Process your feelings and when the time is right, close the feelings loop.
And always remember, I love you and I’m proud of you.